Though Gwyneth Paltrow had a very intimate wedding ceremony to Brad Falchuk last month, she was still able to invite all of her closest friends and loved ones. Unfortunately, her ex-husband, Chris Martin — who she still calls her “family” — wasn’t able to attend the special occasion.

According to OK! magazine, Gwyneth, 46, and the 41-year-old Coldplay singer apparently aren’t as close as they want people to believe. “She and Chris still get along great, but it seems their friendship doesn’t extend beyond co-parenting their kids [Apple, 14, and Moses, 12],” the source explained. “Besides, it was a small guest list to begin with and she didn’t want anything to take the spotlight away from her and Brad’s special day.”

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Chris not being a part of Gwyn’s wedding definitely surprised some fans of the former couple, especially since an insider previously told In Touch that Gwyn wanted Chris to give her away because her dad died in 2002. “To outsiders, it might appear odd, but Brad is used to Chris being a part of their lives,” the insider said, adding that the Goop businesswoman didn’t care how “strange” it was for her ex to attend her nuptials.

Though Gwyneth previously told Stephen Colbert that she now sees Chris as her “brother,” it’s clear that their divorce has affected their close relationship. “Divorce is terrible. It was really painful. It was really hard, and I think we really genuinely wanted our kids to be as unscathed as possible,” Gwyn told the late-night host. “And we thought, if we could really maintain the family even though we weren’t a couple, that was kind of the goal. So that’s what we’ve tried to do.”

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Chris is now reportedly dating actress Dakota Johnson and the two have been getting along very well. If he decides to one day marry the star, it’s possible that Gwyn might not be invited to their wedding either — guess we’ll just have to wait and see!