In her new memoir, 'True Love,' Jennifer Lopez candidly opens up about her seven-year marriage to Marc Anthony and her past failed relationships.
The singer, 45, also poignantly described the moment she realized she wanted a divorce from her now ex-husband.
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"It was one of those moments when you’re so scared you can’t even scream," she wrote. "In a blur of fear and panic, I looked at Benny [Medina] and my mother and blurted out the words: ‘I don’t think I can be with Marc anymore.’ Then I burst into tears."
Jennifer wed her longtime friend Marc, 46, in June 2004 following her breakup with Ben Affleck. The couple welcomed twins Max Muñiz and Emme Muñiz on February 22, 2008. She was previously hitched to Cuban waiter Ojani Noa and backup dancer Cris Judd and had a serious relationship with rapper Sean "Diddy" Combs.
"Anybody looking from the outside in would have thought my life was great. I had a husband and two beautiful children. I was on 'American Idol' and my new single ‘On the Floor’ had gone to number one all over the world," Jennifer wrote of her 2011 split from her husband.
"What people didn’t know was that life really wasn’t that good. My relationship was falling apart and I was terrified," she added.
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In the new memoir, the 'Maid in Manhattan' actress also revealed she often felt "abused" from past relationships.
"I've never gotten a black eye or busted lip, but I have been in relationships where I felt abused one way or another: mentally, emotionally, verbally," she wrote in the excerpt exclusively obtained by 'People' magazine. "I know what it feels like for your soul to be diminished by the way your loved one is treating you."
'True Love' is set to be released in bookstores on Nov. 4.
To read the full excerpt from Jennifer's book go to People.com.
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