Add this to your list of reasons why Barack Obama and Michelle Obama are so relatable. The former First Lady’s new book, Becoming, came out on Tuesday, Nov. 13, and in the memoir, she candidly opens up about how she and Barack went to counseling early on in their marriage.

“We didn’t fight often, and when we did, it was typically over petty things, a string of pent-up aggravations that surfaced usually when one or both of us got overly fatigued or stressed. But we did fight. And for better or worse, I tend to yell when I’m angry,” Michelle writes. “When something sets me off, the feeling can be intensely physical, a kind of fireball running up my spine and exploding in the moment. Barack, meanwhile, tends to remain cool and rational, his words coming in an eloquent (and therefore irritating) cascade.”

Mark Wilson/Getty Images

Perhaps Barack’s calm mood is what made him not want to go to counseling in the first place. “Barack was reluctant at first to try couples counseling. Sitting down in front of a stranger struck him as uncomfortable, if not a tad dramatic,” she writes.

Prior to the book’s publishing, Michelle sat down for an interview with Good Morning America‘s Robin Roberts to talk about to the book. “Marriage counseling, for us, was one of those ways we learned to talk out our differences,” Michelle, 54, revealed. “What I learned about myself was, my happiness was up to me, and I started working out more, I started asking for help, not just from him but from other people. I stopped feeling guilty.”

She then shared some touching words of advice for fans. “I know too many young couples who struggle and think somehow there’s something wrong with them. I want them to know that Michelle and Barack Obama — who have a phenomenal marriage and who love each other — we work on our marriage and we get help with our marriage when we need it,” Michelle said. Where can we find a relationship like theirs?!