We’re so glad Simon Cowell is starting to feel better, however, the X-Factor star admits that after his recent fall, he thought he was dead! Simon was hospitalized following a scary accident at his home on Friday, Oct. 27. At the time, it was reported that he fell down the stairs and was carried out of his London mansion in a neck brace and on a stretcher.

“It’s kind of embarrassing. I went down to get some milk, which isn’t very rock and roll, because I was feeling a little bit lightheaded. I fell down the staircase, woke up, I thought I was dead first of all. I swear to god,” he told This Morning. “As I woke up one of the guys in the room with me, Ben, who’s worked with me for years, was the first face I saw and I thought, ‘This wasn’t my idea of heaven.’ We both thought I’d broken my neck.”

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The TV personality previously opened up about the scary time in another interview as well. “I’d gone to get some hot milk because I felt ropey. On the way back upstairs, I just remember feeling really dizzy. Next thing I know someone was putting a neck brace on me and I had a terrible headache, which must have been from me hitting the stairs. I was worried at first that I’d done some real damage,” he told The Sun of the scare that caused him to miss the live X Factor episodes the following weekend. “But I’m on the mend now. I know I was very lucky I didn’t hurt myself seriously. It could have been a lot worse. I must say, everyone at the hospital wasincredible. I’m truly grateful.”

And even though it’s unknown if Simon’s longtime girlfriend, Lauren Silverman, and their three-year-old son, Eric, were home at the time of the incident, the American Idol star says he’s yet to tell his little boy about the fall and hospitalization (maybe he was sleeping during it?). “He probably would have told me off, and I didn’t want to worry him,” he said, according to People. “He’s only three.”

Simon is also vowing to focus on his health now more than ever for Eric. “Sometimes we get a reminder that we’re not invincible and this was certainly mine. It was a huge shock. They think I fainted because I had low blood pressure and so I have got to really take good care of myself to sort that out,” he shared. “After all I am a dad and have more responsibility than ever.”

As Simon has expressed in the past, as long as his son is well, nothing else matters. “Knowing you will outlive your own child is everyone’s worst nightmare and I am more aware than ever that it can happen to anyone,” he previously said. “Now that I am a father I understand on a much deeper level how devastating it would be to hear the news that your child was unwell.”

This isn’t the first time Simon has given fans a scare in recent months. Over the summer, he crashed a golf cart into a gift shop! “He [stole] a golf cart from where they were filming and off he went,” a source revealed to The Sun at the time. “As he got close to the park’s ghost train he tried to drive the cart into a shop but completely underestimated the width of the door and clattered into some metal detectors. There was a brief period of concern that the judges could have been hurt, but they were soon on their way again.” Please be careful going forward, Simon!