Sharing her truth. Alanis Morissette opened up in a new interview about her crippling battle with postpartum depression. According to the “Ironic” singer, 43, she suffered from serious bouts of sadness following the births of her son, Ever Imre, 6, and her daughter Onyx Solace, 14 months.
“There are days I’m debilitated to the point where I can barely move,” the mother-of-two told People. “As a kid, I imagined having children and being with an amazing partner. This is a whole other wrench I didn’t anticipate.”
During her chat with the publication, Alanis said that she had “horrifyingly scary” visions of her family being harmed after the birth of her son in 2010. She wasn’t diagnosed with PPD until 16 months later. Throughout that time, she also felt other symptoms such as physical pain, lethargy, and insomnia.
Alanis was prepared for the same symptoms after welcoming Onyx with husband Mario “Souleye” Treadway last June. “It’s very isolating,” she said, adding that it was only “seconds later” after giving birth that her PPD kicked in again. “I’m used to being the Rock of Gibraltar, providing, protecting and maneuvering. It had me question everything. I’ve known myself to be a really incredible decision-maker and a leader that people can rely on. [Now] I can barely decide what to eat for dinner.”
The rock star, who told People that her depression is “four times worse” the second time around, is channeling her pain into new music. “I wrote many, many songs over the last three months,” Alanis said. “It was a song a day. I had to start writing songs, or I was going to implode.”
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While the Grammy winner has made a concerted effort to hide her PPD from her kids — “I don’t want it to be their burden” — she did admit that the disorder has taken a toll on her seven-year marriage to Souleye, 37. “My main priority is that I want to make sure both of my children are loved and bonded with and provided for,” she said. “Poor Souleye sometimes gets the dregs of my exhaustion at the end of the night.”
However, Alanis is determined to make sure that she and her rapper hubby power through their current struggles. “I set him up to win as often as I can,” she said. “He’s doing the best he can. I just basically say to him, ‘There’s an end to this, and I’m in the middle of it. I’m so sorry for not being able to be who you typically know me to be.’”